Wednesday, March 17, 2010


Aahhhh, software! My favorite subject! Well, okay, it would be if I were trapped on a deserted island and the only thing to read would be a leaflet of installation instructions that had just washed up on shore. Yea, usually those manuals get tossed aside as I throw caution to the wind and just start clicking on stuff! WOOOHOOO!! Look at me! One finger installation Ma!

Since its tax time and I love, love, LOVE taxtime! *coughB*LLS**Tcough* I opened up my Quickbooks 2006 in my brand spanking new, adorable, precious Mac laptop with the rip roaring new OS Snow Leopard. Yes, I was all set and all psyched to import all my bank statements that I had downloaded for 2009. So quick! So easy! So not happening.......

As I open my latest Quickbooks file from 2008, strange things were a-happenin'. Going back over previous transactions, I stumbled upon things like an entry for something I purchased that no longer had an amount in the charge column, but instead in the deposit column it said *overflow*. Huh? What the F is that? If I actually clicked on the entry, the amount would show, but if I clicked off, our lovely *overflow* was back. But my FAVORITE was a deposit that I had apparently made at a grocery store for $38,573!!! REALLY? Who knew you could make a deposit at your local grocery store! And btw, not a bank branch in the grocery store, but the ACTUAL grocery store!

Something ain't right. Time to call for backup.

So I call Intuit and get some guy named "Sam". Uhhhh....yyyeeeeeeaaaa. He was clearly East Indian and not in my time zone. (I was calling at 9:30pm on a Sunday) If he was in India, what is that.....4:45pm the following Tuesday? I'm no good with those time zone things. Yea, whatever.

Anyway, I explain these odd happenings to....."Sam"......and he cheerfully informs me that QB 2006 isn't compatible with Snow Leopard and that he can help me right away to get the latest version on my new shiny, happy, laptop.

Me: "Hey Sam. How much is this gonna cost me?"

Sam: "Well, you see for $169 we can get you upgraded tonight and this will include technical support, but we will wave that for you at this time and its normally $79"

Me: "Wait, so its $99?"

Sam: "No, its $169."

Me: "But wait, you just said....uh, nevermind."

Sam: "Ok, so do you want to upgrade now?"

Me: "Hey Sam? Why am I seeing QB 2010 online here for $130?"

Sam: "Well you see Miss Kira, it does not include the technical support..."

Me: "Sam? You just said the technical support fee was waved."

Sam: "Yes, Miss Kira, and we can take care of this right now over the phone...."

(Are you confused about those prices and what the hell is transpiring? Yea, I was too. Sam was making no dern sense, I was completely turned around and I just wanted to get off the freakin' phone!)

Me: "Hey Sam? I don't have $170 to blow out my @** right now, so I guess I'll just be doing my taxes on my old laptop....and then at some point buying QB 2010 online from somewhere thats CHEAPER!"

Sam: "Yes, but Miss Kira, it will not include the technical support for which you will have to pay $39.99 each time you call with questions!"

Me: "Uh, Saaaam? I bought QB 2006 back in 2006 and its now 2010 and this is the first time I am calling you."

Sam: "Yes, but Miss Kira?..."

Me: "Sam? Still doesn't change the fact that I don't have $170 to blow out my @**. But thanks anyway."

Sam: "Ok, well can I get your email address so that I can send you a log number for this conversation?"

Me: "Sam? I don't really need a recap of this conversation, but thanks anyway. Plus I don't like to give my email out."

Sam: "You don't want email updates from Intuit about our latest....."

Me: "Sam? Yea, no...not really. Just more crap that I have to delete. I won't read it. I promise you."

Sam: "Well, can I verify the email address we have on file?"

Me: (defeated) "Sure"

Sam: "We have Kira425 @adel...."

Me: "Oh yea! You can have that one! Its my old one and you are more than welcome to send emails to that one all day long! As many as you'd like! Knock yourself out!"

Sam proceeded to keep me on the phone for another few minutes as I buried my face into the couch, trying not to laugh at the ridiculousness that just unfolded.

I wonder if no one calls Intuit......EVER! Sam seemed bored and hell bent on keeping me on the phone. Although, I highly suspect that QB 2010 has several bugs that would require frequent calls to Intuit.


Moving on.

So I fired up my aging, decrepit old Mac and tried to import the transaction files from my checking accounts and credit cards. Funny, they weren't showing up in the register. After a little digging on Wells Fargo's website, I figured out that the first year they support QB for Mac was the 2007 version. Dern. So close.

Needless to say.......I had to suck it up and buy QB 2010.

And no, I did not call Sam, I bought it online for $130!!

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