Just getting up the nerve to call chokes me up. Walking there, I am always on the verge of tears and walking home is always the torrent. Maybe because I would tuck Peanut in my hoodie for the walk because I felt safer. Or maybe because everyone would give him a pat and ask how he is doing. (Yes, I snuck a dog into a restaurant.) Or just maybe he was woven into every part of my life and Sunday evenings just make it so obvious that he is gone.
So today, I am filled with anxiety. I don't know why. I am so anxious and feeling like I am going to explode in a fit of emotions. I had to watch Pirates of the Caribbean: At Worlds End, for the umpteenth time for a project, and at the end, I was sobbing. Ok, its sad that Elizabeth and Will only see each other once every 10 years, but I've seen this movie a gajillion times and so why am I now crying? Ugh. Emotions.
I think my downfall was drinking a Diet Coke. Its a fast forward into anxiety land. How annoying. I drank it because I fell asleep TWICE while watching Pirates....for the umpteenth time. Go figure. Now I'm drinking chamomile tea to try and offset it. Total pain in my ass. Seriously, who has time for out of control emotions...not me. Not ever.