Its been a reeeeeeally long time since I've posted anything, but frankly I haven't had much to talk about. In fact, I've been utterly bored with my life and thus felt the need to spare you all from my holding pattern of limbo that beats me down a little more each day. To give you an example, here is my Groundhog Day that can be plugged into any Monday- Friday.
Go to the Gym.
Walk the Dog.
Shower, Eat, Pack Food, Get ready for Work.
Drive to Work.
Go to Bed.
Doesn't get more exciting than that folks. A Certified 100% pure Groundhog Day. Shoot me now. Its funny too because people think since i work in Hollywood, drive a nice car and live by the beach that my life must be AMAZING!!!
Its repeated and its mind numbing.
Don't read this wrong, I am thankful I have a job and all that, but is my existence for the greater good? Am I curing cancer? Am I leaving a mark? Am I doing anything noteworthy or just taking up space? I guess we all feel that to a certain extent, but I think I'd feel like I was doing something valuable if I were raising children or something. This is where stay-at-home moms should really see how valuable they are. Raising another human to carry on after them is noteworthy. If I never have children, what will be my legacy? Getting you fine folks to waste money on seeing/buying movies that you didn't really want to watch or buy in the first place? What kind of legacy is that? Will I be noted for ANYTHING? "Hey that Kira, she really did amazing stuff! She managed to stop by Starbucks each morning before work!" or "Wow, that Kira! She was amazing huh?! She walked the dog TWO TIMES a day! TWO!! WHOA!!"
I'm not saying my life would be perfect if I had a husband and kids, but having a family gives you purpose to getting up each day. Sharing your life and experiences with a family unit makes you feel like your existence is justified and its nice to have people to witness you and your life and vice versa. Being part of a unit makes you think of others and the greater good of the family. Some people do better being selfless than selfish. I think when you are alone you don't care about a lot of things like you would if you were part of a group. Maybe I'm rambling like a crazy person and it would stand a fit argument for someone like me who has been flying in circles to nowhere day in and day out for years.
To quote my favorite musician Nik Kershaw:
"Cold and lonely, tired and bored
just like the day before
Missing out on life's rewards
of that you can be sure
So bring on the dancing girls."
So back to my hole. Waiting for the alarm to go off so I can repeat the same day again and again.